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Gulp…..

This is sooooo weird. Weid in that it is now the uniqueness of it as opposed to how it was, once, for most of my life, the “norm.” I have this feeling, right now, of great apprehension. I would say “impending doom” (and that IS more descriptive but a little dramatic.). I used to be like this ALL THE TIME. A nervous sort, unbeknownst, generally, to those around me except those extremely close to me, maybe two or three people. I have been on a med for it for about a year and it was a blessing,. a God send. It made me “a new normal,” just like everyone else. Not nervous at all. I feel like, I don’t know how to describe it: butterflies before a test, getting a crummy car inspected, going to the doctor, having maggie say “I need to talk to you,” you know, s**t like that. maybe worse: a terrorist attack, the death of a loved one, an accident, a nuclear meltdown, getting canned? Well, I took my pill and hopefully it will calm me down. BUT, I want it noted that IF something happens, there is proof of intuition, even in men, who generally ignore it. And, as Jolene says, why worry, “It is what it is.” And, of course, God tells us that I can do anything thru He who gives me strength. But, the pill isn’t working, yet. so maybe I better rely on faith.

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